Review: The Flash

And with that, the DCEU as we know it crashes into a chaotic, messy grave.

Barry Allen, aka The Flash, has never gotten over the loss of his mother and his father’s false conviction of her murder. Despite warnings, he uses speedforce to time travel and save her. Unfortunately, the warnings were warranted, as Barry finds he has altered reality and doomed his world.

Last year, 2022, Warner Brothers announced they would not be releasing Batgirl, a film that had entered post-production that year and was basically a finished product as a “cost-cutting” measure. In the same year, The Flash actor Ezra Miller was found under criminal charges that escalated over several months. They however, still star in a film that still got released… despite their best efforts to ruin their reputation. The DCEU has been a mess since the second movie it released, things have not changed. We still have Aquaman 2 arriving as well… which stars Amber Heard.

The Flash went through extensive reshoots, as well as having been in development since… 2014, unsurprisingly during production on the ill-fated Batman Vs Superman. One can only imagine how many changes this script has been through, and it shows.

Because DC movies can’t ever be about one hero, it always descends into a Justice Group of some sort.

Poor director Andy Muschietti is surely not to blame for this. His directorial resume is stellar: both IT chapters and Mama. The Flash is a chaotic mess of tone, narrative heel-turns and rampant plot conveniences. Ezra Miller, who was already quite annoying as Barry in the (also ill-fated) Justice League movie, is duplicated in this film. Barry’s time-traveling causes there to be two of him at once, so if you had a problem with the character’s grating personality before, we had bad news for you.

An example of plot conveniences: Barry is time-hopping around, but is pushed out by a mysterious figure, but before he can think about that, he finds himself not only on the day he got his powers, but also the day before Zod’s attack on Metropolis (seen in 2013’s Man of Steel) Wow. Some definite chuckles from the audience on those coincidences.

But yes, the film tries to run two narratives side by side. Our original Barry, in trying to fix his mistake that has “removed all meta humans” (not true) from the world, and this younger Barry who is going through the character’s origin story. Which… isn’t a bad idea in theory. It would certainly shift the generic origin story from being quite so stale.
Unfortunately, it is this Barry Allen… and the energy quickly becomes grating (pun intended?) and the amount of ground the film needs to cover (pun intended?) is far too much.

But it is okay! Warner Brothers has the solution to the problem! It always works!


Keaton was in the RoboCop remake. Sadly, his appearance is not a sign of quality.

Seriously, this has to stop. Stop putting Batman on everything like it is a cure-all.

Tim Burton’s two Batman movies are excellent. They are also a time capsule of a very different time. Michael Keaton was an excellent Batman, and he had every reason to reprise the role one more time. This film… wasted Michael Keaton.
Somehow, Spider-man: No Way Home, successfully brought Willem Dafoe and Alfred Molina back harmoniously. More than that. They built on to the MCU and influenced Peter Parker’s character far more than could have been imagined. Here… No. This is rampant fan service for the sake of it. It could have been Ben Affleck, it could have been anyone.

It doesn’t even make sense. Barry hasn’t moved multiverses; the change has affected who is where. Henry Cavill’s much missed Superman isn’t here because events changed so that Sasha Calle’s Kara was sent to Earth as well. This is a ridiculous butterfly effect for putting a can of tomatoes in a shopping cart, but okay we can run with it… but why would Ben Affleck become Michael Keaton‘s Batman?

The film is a disaster that has the audience asking questions rather than sitting back and enjoying it. Or trying to adjust to Miller’s… energy. Sometimes there’s a neat laugh, or a funny moment, or a tiny morsel of emotional weight. Sasha Calle is okay as Kara. But no… ultimately this is the death rattle of an Expanded Universe that deflated like an old balloon.

If you have thoroughly enjoyed the films so far, more power to you; you will probably enjoy this film a lot. If you want to watch this film solely for Michael Keaton… don’t. Just watch the Burton films again.

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